As I gaze upon the early face of fall and watch the season progress toward winter, I’m reminded of my mother’s journey with Alzheimer’s. The early stages of this disease are now progressing into something more serious for her, but she’s entirely unaware.
My grandmother had Alzheimer’s so I’m no stranger to this disease that slowly steals the mind.
Slowly the person you love and know so well begins to disappear.
They no longer recognize you, and you don’t recognize them either.
But you still love them, and you still have your memories.
And so when I talk to my mother now, we talk about things in the far past.
Things she can still remember … like our old dog, or a funny story from a Christmas past.
At first her Alzheimer’s made me feel despair, sadness, and even loneliness.
My mother who knew me inside and out, now looks at me with fading knowledge of who I am.
But now, I see her Alzheimer’s as a sort of blessing in disguise.
She has no concern or fear of finances, health, and the worries of the world.
My mother has a certain innocence and child-eyed wonder about her now.
Although her memory is fading, her beauty still remains.
So while I still have her, I will enjoy every smile and coherent sentence that she utters.